The Heart Wants What it Wants

There are many ups
and downs for this Zardozi woman who is on her heart’s quest to find Mr. Right. 

“L’amour est come le vent, nous ne savons pas d’ou il vient.”

Love is like the wind, we don’t know where it comes from

~Balzac

They say, you can find love at the most unexpected
moments.  Like the quote above, love is like
the wind, we don’t know where it comes from.

The heart is a mystery. We try to control how we fall in
love and when. But sometimes it just happens. I realise now I was resisting my
feelings for Mr. M and pushing him away for a long time because I was scared of
caring out of fear that loving him would leave me in pain if it didn’t work
out. I was right about that since it did end that way. But maybe that was a
self-fulfilling prophecy.

Now I am trying once again to open my heart, knowing that I
cannot have the benefits of love, without taking some chances.

One man I matched with, chatted with me for quite some time
on the app. He asked me to meet him, but I told him that my heart had not yet
healed from Mr. M.  He asked again and
this time I thought I should take the risk instead of hiding at home, being
fearful of the potential to get hurt again.

We met for a drink and I was relieved to find that he was attractive
in person and we had a really nice conversation. The man seemed very intellectual
and worldly.

As we chatted, he was fumbling with the straw lying on the table and created the shape of a heart out of it. It was sweet and even though I briefly forgot about Mr. M, the memories of him came trickling back into my mind again soon after. Maybe I should take a break from all this dating for good.

Read part eight of this Zardozi woman’s dating journey here.

SHOWHIDE Comments (0)

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.

twelve − ten =