There are many ups and downs for this Zardozi woman who is on her quest to find Mr. Right on Tinder.
I had heard about online dating, who hasn’t? A friend encouraged me to give it a go, but I hesitated. Wouldn’t it be easier, safer, to meet someone when I was out with my friends, at the bar, in the grocery store, anywhere but online.
Finally I gave in to the curiosity surrounding what types of people you could find in the online world.
At first when I set up my profile, I didn’t even include a picture. I just wanted a chance to scope out my options, to see if there was anyone even worth meeting. What I mean by that is anyone handsome enough to catch my eye. Let’s fess up to the reality. Dating apps are purely superficial, but that is no different than spotting someone attractive across the bar. We base our first impression on looks and then make a decision on the everlasting endurance of a relationship, based on the emotional and intellectual connection.
“Let’s fess up to the reality. Dating apps are purely superficial, but that is no different than spotting someone attractive across the bar.”
This is not your Mom and Dad’s old school matchmaking. But it is the modern day version and it can work…. I hope.
The first day on the app didn’t prove to be very successful.
The next morning, during some down time at work, I opened the app again. After a few negative swipes, I came across a guy that looked pretty good and somewhat normal. He had not posted any strange pictures of him with a snake around his neck or shooting wild ducks. It is amazing the kinds of weird pictures you see on these apps.
I clicked on him and was immediately notified by the app that I was a match. He started to message me, and it led to a relationship lasting several months.
I’m going to refer to him as Mr. M, short for Mr. Middle East. Corny, cheesy I know, but he really was so goodlooking as well as brave, caring and kind. Not to mention he was also a gentleman. All the qualities you would not assume to find on an app that is notorious for hook-ups. I’m not looking for someone who is mouthwatering hot. I’m looking for a MAN, someone who compliments me emotionally and intellectually, and of course is handsome too. My match. Everyone’s idea of attraction is different.
Initially I nervously agreed to meeting Mr. M, but only in the presence of my friends. After that first “date,” we both got off the app. He told me he didn’t feel he needed to be on there since he found me. What was the point in looking elsewhere, when I too had found a good catch. My friends who had been in the online dating scene for several months lamented that they could not find a man like him, and that I had lucked out, claiming men like him didn’t exist on these apps.
I felt hopeful that love was possible for me.
Unfortunately, things didn’t work out with him and soon after I found myself wondering if I should re-install the app. I forced myself to get back to swiping. Why stay home crying over a man that may never come back? I figured returning to the world of swiping would hopefully distract me enough to get over him.
I figured online dating couldn’t be as bad as the horror stories that my friends share, since I had found such a “gem” online. Since returning to the dating app, life has been an odd adventure meeting new people. This is my dating diary. We can laugh and cry together on my journey of swiping for love.
Read part two of her journey here.